Still Learning From My Daughter

Yesterday marked three months since Naya passed and I'm still learning how to process my emotions. I want to focus on the way she took everyday as it unfolded and made the most of every moment even though many of those movements she felt like crap. She would make plans to ride PJ, or which classes she was going to attend, or make plans to craft with friends and not for a moment think, "maybe I won't feel strong enough to do that so maybe I shouldn't plan." It's still raw and even though I want to focus on the strength she showed me how to pull from I still have those moments where it's hard not to get angry, mad as hell in fact, and frustrated with the odds that she was dealt. My own weakness try's to get the better of me. Then I think about how she never let those feelings in, instead, pushed and fought and worked hard to enjoy life. So how can I do anything but that?

She will always continue to amaze me! So now Sam, the puppy she convinced us to add to our household, is getting big, livin large, and taking over the role of leader of the pack. Take a look. Already housebroken and smart as a whip at 4 months old I'm sure she would approve. Just like Sam, I'll keep learning. I just hope I'm as good of a teacher to him as Naya was, is, to me.

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